I hear people say all the time that the definition of insanity is to do the same thing over and over and expect a different result. By this definition I have come to the conclusion that I am, in fact, insane.
Let me explain:
Every day I wake up and tell my kids to get dressed, eat breakfast, do their hair and brush their teeth. I expect them to do it. They don’t (at least not without some serious threats.) Yet, every day I tell them to do the same thing expecting that they will. I am Insane.
Every time that I wash laundry (a chore that makes one seriously insane just by itself) I assume that I am ‘done with laundry’ once it has been washed, dried, folded and put away. I even go so far as to say out loud that I am done with the laundry, or make a line through it on the horrible to do list. And at some point during the same day, sometimes even moments after I complete (or think that I complete) the retched task, there is more laundry to do. But I expected that since I have done it all day that I am done with it. I am insane.
I have this theory that one day I will clean my house and it will stay clean for more than an hour. It never does. But I still expect it to each time that I clean my house. I am insane.
There is this certain child that I have who I am convinced is the pickiest eater on the face of the planet. He shall remain nameless, but I will give you a hint: he is 5 and his name starts with A and ends with nderson. This child complains about 90% of every meal that I prepare for him. But I still cook the same thing and serve it to the boy expecting that he will eat it. I am insane.
I frequently go to the Walmart and with me are 3 little tag alongs most of the time. I can verbally tell them each time that we are driving to the store that we will not be purchasing toys today. I threaten them that if they ask for said toys at the store that I might just leave them there with a for sale sign attached to them. I expect them to listen. But still every time that we go the Walmart, there are tears, and pleads and bribing that occur because of the toys that will not be purchased. I am insane.
You see, I am insane. That is only a few examples of the insanity that I indulge in. If I think about it more then I am certain that there are more examples of insanity that I could share with you.
I am not the only insane person in my house, either. My boys, each one of them, ask me every day if they can stay home from school for no reason other than they want to. Each day they expect me to say yes. And each day when I say no there are massive fits (this intern makes me insane because I expect there will not be a fits each day.) They are insane.
Said trips to the Walmart where toy purchases are banished and yet they expect me to give in. They are insane.
Baby girl continually throws fits and screams to get her way. We are (trying) to ignore her and (mostly) do not give in to the pig squealing, but she constantly screams expecting to get her way. She is insane.
Kevin, who for this instance will be called the ‘baby whisperer’ tries to calm baby girls fits by whispering in her ear, sh, shhh, shhhhh. She escalates her fits when he does this (I am waiting for her to turn around and punch him dead in the face one of these times.) He expects that she will calm down. Never has (nor will it ever) happened. He is insane.
Spouse also has this habit of putting important things in random places. I call it the “stupidest place imaginable syndrome” We find his belts hanging off the hinges of doors, socks in the bathroom closet on top of the towels, keys in the freezer, phones balanced on top of molding- you get the point. He puts these things in these random places and he expects that he will be able to find them, or remember what it was that he was looking for on this particular instance. He is insane.
See, I am not alone in my insanity. We all have degrees of it.
I should check myself into a loony-bin.
You know what is really insane?!? That sound like a good break to me.
Let me explain:
Every day I wake up and tell my kids to get dressed, eat breakfast, do their hair and brush their teeth. I expect them to do it. They don’t (at least not without some serious threats.) Yet, every day I tell them to do the same thing expecting that they will. I am Insane.
Every time that I wash laundry (a chore that makes one seriously insane just by itself) I assume that I am ‘done with laundry’ once it has been washed, dried, folded and put away. I even go so far as to say out loud that I am done with the laundry, or make a line through it on the horrible to do list. And at some point during the same day, sometimes even moments after I complete (or think that I complete) the retched task, there is more laundry to do. But I expected that since I have done it all day that I am done with it. I am insane.
I have this theory that one day I will clean my house and it will stay clean for more than an hour. It never does. But I still expect it to each time that I clean my house. I am insane.
There is this certain child that I have who I am convinced is the pickiest eater on the face of the planet. He shall remain nameless, but I will give you a hint: he is 5 and his name starts with A and ends with nderson. This child complains about 90% of every meal that I prepare for him. But I still cook the same thing and serve it to the boy expecting that he will eat it. I am insane.
I frequently go to the Walmart and with me are 3 little tag alongs most of the time. I can verbally tell them each time that we are driving to the store that we will not be purchasing toys today. I threaten them that if they ask for said toys at the store that I might just leave them there with a for sale sign attached to them. I expect them to listen. But still every time that we go the Walmart, there are tears, and pleads and bribing that occur because of the toys that will not be purchased. I am insane.
You see, I am insane. That is only a few examples of the insanity that I indulge in. If I think about it more then I am certain that there are more examples of insanity that I could share with you.
I am not the only insane person in my house, either. My boys, each one of them, ask me every day if they can stay home from school for no reason other than they want to. Each day they expect me to say yes. And each day when I say no there are massive fits (this intern makes me insane because I expect there will not be a fits each day.) They are insane.
Said trips to the Walmart where toy purchases are banished and yet they expect me to give in. They are insane.
Baby girl continually throws fits and screams to get her way. We are (trying) to ignore her and (mostly) do not give in to the pig squealing, but she constantly screams expecting to get her way. She is insane.
Kevin, who for this instance will be called the ‘baby whisperer’ tries to calm baby girls fits by whispering in her ear, sh, shhh, shhhhh. She escalates her fits when he does this (I am waiting for her to turn around and punch him dead in the face one of these times.) He expects that she will calm down. Never has (nor will it ever) happened. He is insane.
Spouse also has this habit of putting important things in random places. I call it the “stupidest place imaginable syndrome” We find his belts hanging off the hinges of doors, socks in the bathroom closet on top of the towels, keys in the freezer, phones balanced on top of molding- you get the point. He puts these things in these random places and he expects that he will be able to find them, or remember what it was that he was looking for on this particular instance. He is insane.
See, I am not alone in my insanity. We all have degrees of it.
I should check myself into a loony-bin.
You know what is really insane?!? That sound like a good break to me.
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